Funny Laws
Florida Funny Laws

-The state constitution allows for freedom of speech, a trial by jury, and pregnant pigs to not be confined in cages.
-One may not commit any "unnatural acts" with another person.
-Unmarried couples may not commit "lewd acts" and live together in the same residence.
-Corrupting the public morals is defined as a nuisance, and is declared a misdemeanor offense.
-Doors of all public buildings must open outwards.
-It is illegal to sell your children.
-Women may be fined for falling asleep under a hair dryer, as can the salon owner.
-A special law prohibits unmarried women from parachuting on Sunday or she shall risk arrest, fine, and/or jailing.
-If an elephant is left tied to a parking meter, the parking fee has to be paid just as it would for a vehicle.
-It is illegal to sing in a public place while attired in a swimsuit.
-Men may not be seen publicly in any kind of strapless gown.
-Having sexual relations with a porcupine is illegal.
-It is illegal to skateboard without a license.
-When having sex, only the missionary position is legal.
-You may not fart in a public place after 6 Pm on Thursday.
-It is considered an offense to shower naked.
-You are not allowed to break more than three dishes per day, or chip the edges of more than four cups and/or saucers.
-Oral sex is illegal.
-You may not kiss your wife's breasts.
-Penalty for horse theft is death by hanging.
-It is illegal to block any traveled wagon road.

Florida City Laws

Big Pine Key:
-It is illegal to molest a Key deer.
Broward County:
-Persons may not be "inappropriately attired" who work at hot dog stands.
Cape Coral:
-It is against the city ordinance to hang your clothes outside on a clothesline.
-It it illegal to park a pick-up truck in your driveway or in front of your house on the street.
Cape Coral City:
-A $50 fine will be levied on anyone who allows a couch to sit in their carport.
Daytona Beach:
-The molestation of trash cans is banned.
-Maintaining a car on your property which is no longer in use is prohibited.
-Owning a flower pot with water in it that isn't capable of draining is considered a public nuisance.
Destin:
-It is illegal for an owner of a store to allow another person to pass out free ducklings in front of the store.
-Destin states that a cat that viciously chases passers-by is a ‘bad cat’.
-If you wish to go swimming in the ocean, get dressed in your hotel room.
-Torpedoes may not be set off in the city.
-If you like to love to ride your bicycle in Destin, don’t lean it up against a tree in a cemetery.
-It is illegal to drive over graves in a cemetery.
-If you notice an ice-cream man attempting to sell his cold concoctions in a cemetery, call the police immediately, for that is illegal.
Hialeah:
-Ambling and strolling is a misdemeanor.
-You may not shoot missiles at ostriches.
Key West:
-Chickens are considered a 'protected species'.
Miami:
-You cannot use a whistle on a bicycle
Miami Beach:
-Skateboarding is not allowed at any police station.
-Persons face up to thirty days in jail for selling oranges on the sidewalk.
-Termite farms are not allowed within the city.
-No one may bring a pig with them to a theater.
Naples:
-Neon signs are prohibited.
Palm Bay:
-Persons may not tow a sled behind their bicycles.
Pensacola:
-Citizens may not be caught downtown without at least 10 dollars on their person.
-It is illegal to roll a barrel on any street, fines go up according to the contents of the barrel.
-A woman can be fined (only after death), for being electrocuted in a bath-tub because of using self-beautification utensils.
Pinecrest:
-You need a permit to operate a burglar alarm.
Sanford:
-Stage nudity is banned, with the exception of "bona fide" theatrical performances.
Sarasota:
-If you hit a pedestrian you are fined $78.
-You may not catch crabs.
Satellite Beach:
-Beer may not be sold between 2 and 7am.
-Persons may not appear in public clothed in liquid latex.
Seaside:
-All houses much have white picket fences and full-width, two-story porches.
Tampa:
-Women may not expose their breasts while performing "topless dancing".
-Lap dances must be given at least six feet away from a patron.
-It is illegal to eat cottage cheese on Sunday after 6:00 P.M.
 
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